Thanks, Yves Saint Laurent, for managing to make me hate Vincent Cassel, Darren Aronofsky, and Gaspar Noé all in one fell swoop. Although I take issue with everything about this new ad campaign hawking the “La Nuit de L’Homme” scent (who, exactly, wants to smell like Vincent Cassel anyway?), did they really have to go and taint the careers of these guys? I used to respect them. Now, not so much.

Of the three, Gaspar’s the only one I figure probably needs the money. His brand of filmmaking doesn’t exactly light up the box office. When I heard he did a commercial for Yves Saint Laurent, I was hoping for something along the lines of the last one I saw from him — a PSA called Sodomites. If you haven’t seen or heard of that one, do yourself a favour, fire up a bittorrent, and enjoy the assault on your brain. But no, instead we get the usual black and white mimbo crap with a bunch of hot rich bitches pretending they sooooo want to jump Vincent Cassel’s bones even though he’s creepy as hell. And despite it being shot by Noé, it doesn’t even end with sodomy. Not even a little bit.

Still, for two minutes and fifteen seconds, there’s entertainment value to be had from the Aronofsky ad. Take a look and count how many times Cassel flashes the hot chicks a look that makes you want to take a shower or file a restraining order. Does once a frame for every second he’s on screen count? If so, I make it several thousand.